I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Randomize