Sponge bath it is.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
