you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Randomize
