"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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