speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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