it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
