she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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