so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
