who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
