You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize