I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
