did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
well you can't waste a boner
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
