i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
