Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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