I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Randomize