Well douche your snatch and let's go!
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
