Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
