i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
