Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
