We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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