She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
