Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
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