why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
