He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
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