at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
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