you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
