North Korea, Best Korea!
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
