Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize