cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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