smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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