dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
