we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
