they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
