I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
