it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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