should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
