It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
