i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Randomize
