why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Randomize
