nut hugger
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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