so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Im just a social blackout drinker.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize