guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
