God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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