# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
