Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
She announced her abortion via fbk
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
