not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I'm too high and old for this...
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
