i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
