i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
