just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
