walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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