What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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