you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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